A few days after the birth of my son, I lay in bed crying. No, it wasn’t from the C-section pain. It wasn’t postpartum depression. It wasn’t lack of sleep (although that didn’t help).

I had just touched my post-pregnancy belly for the first time.

And it was…..squishy.

I never had awesome washboard abs of steel or anything, but my stomach had been decently firm and not too round for most of my adult life. On my list of likes and dislikes concerning my body, it was a steady resident of the “Acceptable” category (unlike my thighs….).

Suddenly I had a tummy that was soft and jiggly and nothing at all like the tummy I remembered. WHOSE BODY WAS THIS?!

Ten months later, that tummy is still with me. I lost my pregnancy weight very quickly thanks to a 9.5-lb baby, breastfeeding, and God’s provision. Adding a weekly Zumba class has helped my physical and emotional fitness. I’ve even started buying pants in a smaller size.

Yet the baby belly remains, threatening to return me to those bigger pants and mocking me with it’s squishy, shapeless form.

A dear friend of mine said that one day, a year or so after her son was born, she finally did find some muscle in her tummy again. So I can hope. And do crunches. And complain to y’all.

But in the meantime, I do want to say —

It was totally worth it!